The Happiness Expert: Retrain Your Brain For Maximum Happiness: Mo Gawdat | E144

The video is an interview with Mo Gawdat, a happiness expert, discussing his approach to finding joy and flow in life.

The video is an interview with Mo Gawdat, an expert on the topic of happiness who was previously the head of Google X. The interviewer discusses with Gawdat his approach to finding happiness, which involves retraining the brain to focus on joy and flow rather than stress and negativity. Gawdat explains that he takes a theme for every year of his life, and 2022 is the year of joy inflow. He also discusses his minimalist lifestyle and his decision to live in the moment and go with the flow rather than seeking stability and comfort.

• Mo Gawdat is an expert on happiness and the head of Google X.
• He believes that thoughts are the most resilient parasite and the brain is supposed to make us happy.
• The top three reasons for unhappiness are unknown purpose, lack of control, and fear.
• Mo's life is ever-changing, with a theme for every year, and 2022 is the year of joy inflow for him.
• He believes in empowering his feminine side and did well in 2020 with his approach to flow.
• Mo believes stability is not necessary for happiness and retirement should be spread out over a career.
• Living as a half monk means spending 50% of your time in monk-like activities and 50% in modern-day warrior activities.
• Gawdat's approach to life involves dividing his week into two days of intense work and five days of reflection and exploration.
• He believes happiness is a state of mind that can be achieved by retraining your brain and focusing on the present moment.

The Happiness Expert: Retrain Your Brain For Maximum Happiness: Mo Gawdat | E144 - YouTube

Introduction

• Mo Gawdat is an expert on happiness.
• Google made him the head of Google X.
• He believes that the most resilient parasite is a thought.
• He thinks that the brain is supposed to make us happy, not just successful.
• He believes that the top three reasons for unhappiness in the world are...

Mo Gawdat's Life

• Mo's life is ever-changing.
• He had a year of silence and space in 2020.
• He had a year of flow in 2021.
• He has a theme for every year.
• 2022 is the year of joy inflow for him.

Mo Gawdat's Approach to Flow

• Mo believes in empowering his feminine side.
• He thinks that creativity, paradoxical thinking, and flow are hyper-feminine traits.
• He did very well in 2020 with his approach to flow.
• He tends to be very personal when it comes to his presence on social media.
• He has packed everything up and has no idea where he's going from here.

The Happiness Expert: Retrain Your Brain For Maximum Happiness: Mo Gawdat | E144 - YouTube

The Importance of Stability

• Mo believes that we tend to believe that we need stability or home comforts to make ourselves happy.
• He thinks that we can be happy without those things.
• He has been a freelancer and has drifted through the world.
• He believes that we can do it for a short period of time.
• He is in London because of his book publication.

Balance between Adventure and Stability

• Every person wants both adventure and stability in life.
• Context changes throughout life, and it's important to recognize when it's time to explore a new part of life.
• Many people don't recognize what their hearts, souls, and bodies are signaling to them.
• Retirement should be spread out over the course of a career, rather than saved for the end.
• It's possible to spend 50% of your life as a monk and 50% as a modern-day warrior.

Challenging Yourself to Find Balance

• Being extreme in one area of life can blind you to the need for balance.
• It's important to challenge yourself to explore new parts of life.
• Recognizing signals from your heart, soul, and body is key to finding balance.
• It's possible to divide retirement time throughout a career to better enjoy life.
• Spending 50% of your life as a monk and 50% as a modern-day warrior is a viable ambition.

Living as a Half Monk

• Living as a half monk means spending 50% of your time in monk-like activities and 50% in modern-day warrior activities.
• Monk-like activities include connection, reflection, stillness, silence, and service to the world.
• Modern-day warrior activities include business, coaching, and other daily tasks.
• It's possible to make this lifestyle work by stepping out of the mainstream of daily life.
• It's important to have a manager who supports your creative lifestyle.

Redesigning Life for Maximum Happiness

• Retirement should be spread out over the course of a career, rather than saved for the end.
• Working seven months of the year and taking three months off would be a better way to live.
• Spending 50% of your life as a monk and 50% as a modern-day warrior is a viable ambition.
• It's important to recognize signals from your heart, soul, and body to find balance in life.
• Living as a half monk requires stepping out of the mainstream of daily life.

Mo Gawdat's Approach to Life

• Gawdat divides his week into two days of intense work and five days of reflection and exploration.
• He believes that silence and reflection are important for finding new ideas and perspectives.
• Gawdat recently left his mainstream life to explore new opportunities and see where serendipity takes him.
• He values his current lifestyle over a traditional committed relationship because he feels he can help more people this way.
• Gawdat has deep, loving relationships that are honest but not necessarily lasting.

Matthew Ricard's Approach to Life

• Matthew Ricard is a renowned monk who left his life and became a monk to pursue his own journey.
• He had 60,000 hours of lifetime meditation which reconfigured his brain in a way that was publicly studied.
• Ricard left his girlfriend, PhD, and life in Paris to become a monk because he wanted to pursue his own pilgrimages and be next to his teachers.
• He believes it would be unfair to have someone in his life expect him to be there all the time when he wants to spend time in isolation and reflection.
• Ricard values his own journey over a traditional committed relationship.

Mo Gawdat's Definition of Relationships

• Gawdat believes that the traditional committed relationship is one specific definition of relationships that our world has stuck to for a period of time.
• He thinks there are multiple definitions of relationships today.
• Gawdat's current lifestyle does not qualify him for a committed relationship, but he has deep, loving relationships that are honest.
• He feels that an hour spent with one person could also be an hour spent helping a thousand people.
• Gawdat's focus is on where he wants to put his hours of life and where he wants to be.

Mo Gawdat's Journey to Finding Happiness

• Gawdat believes that happiness is a state of mind that can be achieved by retraining your brain.
• He believes that happiness is not the absence of problems, but the ability to deal with them.
• Gawdat's journey to finding happiness began after his son passed away, which led him to write a book called "Solve for Happy."
• He believes that happiness is a skill that can be learned and practiced.
• Gawdat's approach to finding happiness involves focusing on the present moment, accepting what is, and finding joy in the journey.

Recognizing Changing Seasons

• Attachment is one of the biggest reasons for unhappiness in life.
• Every single one of us needs to live that for a phase of our life for a season.
• That failure to recognize the changing seasons sometimes results in a narrowness of our life that makes us stick to one path.
• The game here is to be able to allow yourself to rather than plan and say my safety my security my everything to allow yourself to sit back and say what where is what's life saying.
• Wisdom if you want it depends on if you're spiritual or not if you believe that there is a part to you that is not physical call it consciousness or call it a soul if you're spiritual that part is senses things that are a little bit beyond the limitations of the physical.

Intuition and Investigating

• If the way that other part of you communicates to you is through intuition it cannot plant a text message in your head and say by the way by the 14th you need to be in London it just gets you gives you that feeling of something is missing from here and something needs to be attended to there do you want to investigate.
• Those who are able to go like let me find out okay let me find out let me check this out normally stumble upon some of the biggest changes to our lives all of us not just their lives.
• If you really look back at your life really most of the events that actually shaped you that actually changed your lives were not planned at all.

Changing Context

• The changing context is we have a tendency because we are designed as survival machines to want things to remain exactly the same if it's comfortable if it's safe let's keep it right.
• That attachment is one of the biggest reasons for unhappiness in life.
• Every single one of us needs to live that for a phase of our life for a season.
• That failure to recognize the changing seasons sometimes results in a narrowness of our life that makes us stick to one path.
• The game here is to be able to allow yourself to rather than plan and say my safety my security my everything to allow yourself to sit back and say what where is what's life saying.

Retraining Your Brain

• Retraining your brain is about recognizing that the way you feel is not a function of what's happening in your life it's a function of what you focus on.
• It's a function of the questions you ask yourself and the way you interpret the events that are happening around you.
• It's a function of the stories you tell yourself about what's happening around you.
• It's a function of the beliefs you hold about yourself and the world around you.
• It's a function of the habits that you have built over time.

The Quest of Life

• Life is a quest, not a journey.
• A journey has a plotted path and a destination, while a quest is uncertain.
• On a quest, you take a few steps forward, stop, assess, reflect, and adjust your path.
• There's nothing wrong with taking two steps forward, assessing, going left, and then going back.
• Setting off on a quest requires inspiration or a reason.

The Complexity of Life

• We are complex beings made up of emotions, reflections, traumas, stories, backgrounds, and desires.
• Life is unsimplifiable, and we should enjoy it fully.
• There are layers of complexity that create a life worth living.
• Our attachment to certain things deprives us of other flavors in life.
• Life changes, and we need to adjust our context and focus on ourselves.

The Contradiction in Relationships

• Love and relationships are never taken for granted.
• We fall in love with different versions of our partners throughout our lives.
• As life changes, we may become further apart from our partners.
• It's essential to focus on ourselves and find what we want to do with our lives.
• Most people would get into a stage of constant change and say, "I don't like this. I want my sweetheart back."

The Formula for Happiness

• Happiness is the absence of unhappiness.
• Unhappiness is the gap between our expectations and reality.
• We need to retrain our brains to focus on what we have, not what we lack.
• We should stop comparing ourselves to others and focus on our own journey.
• Our happiness formula is unique to us, and we need to find what works for us.

Love and Relationships

• Love is not just about romance and intimacy.
• There are 20 ways two partners can enjoy and benefit from each other's company.
• Defining love as just sex and intimacy is a recipe for disappointment.
• Every relationship goes through changes, and it's important to embrace and grow with them.
• If one aspect of a relationship ends, the rest should continue to grow.

Compromise and Priorities

• Life is a question of compromise.
• The best of both worlds is not always possible.
• It's important to prioritize and make choices.
• Living fully should be the number one priority.
• Personal comfort and settlement can be selfish.
• Life is about making choices and prioritizing.

Mo's Personal Experience

• Mo left an apartment he enjoyed to pursue his mission and freedom.
• He is currently in London to work on his next book.
• Life is full of choices and compromises.
• Mo believes in prioritizing his mission over personal comfort.
• He hopes to find a woman who aligns with his priorities.

Love vs. Billion Happy

• Mo believes that prioritizing his mission to make a billion people happy is more important than personal love.
• He feels that dedicating his life to helping others is more fulfilling than personal comfort.
• Mo acknowledges that personal love is important, but it's not his top priority at the moment.
• He hopes to find a woman who supports his mission and can join him on his trips.
• Life is about making choices and prioritizing what's important.

The Three Biggest Reasons for Unhappiness

• Ego, lack of self-love, and the little voice in your head are the top three reasons for unhappiness in the world.
• The little voice in your head has the power to turn any event into an unhappy thought.
• The book "That Little Voice in Your Head" aims to address these three topics to help make the world happier.
• The brain is the ultimate technology, but most people don't know how to use it as well as their smartphones and devices.
• The book uses an analogy between neuroscience and computer science to help people use their brains more effectively.

The Illusions We Live Under

• Everything we haven't investigated and arrived at our own conviction about is probably an illusion.
• Illusions surround us, from the value of branded bags to what the government is supposed to do.
• Reflecting on our behavior and feelings can help us determine our reality and avoid illusions.
• The book "That Little Voice in Your Head" is an admission of the mistakes the author made using his brain.
• One of the author's biggest mistakes was believing that his family was a burden and responsibility.

The Basics of the Book

• The first chapter of the book is titled "The Basics."
• The chapter introduces the inspiration behind the book and the illusions we live under.
• The author reflects on his own mistakes and how he used his brain in the past.
• The book aims to help people use their brains as effectively as their smartphones and devices.
• The author uses an analogy between neuroscience and computer science to explain how the brain works.

The Ultimate Goal

• The ultimate goal of the book is to help people find joy and flow in life.
• The author believes that happiness is a state of mind that can be achieved through intentional use of time and thoughts.
• The book aims to help people retrain their brains for maximum happiness.
• The author believes that everyone has the potential for happiness and that it is within reach.
• The book provides practical tools and exercises to help readers achieve happiness.

The Power of Thoughts

• Our brains believe what we tell them.
• Our thoughts shape our behavior and actions.
• A thought implanted deep in our brain can become a resilient parasite.
• Limiting or imprisoning thoughts can become the satellite navigation of our lives.
• Identifying and eradicating these thoughts is crucial to living authentically.

Finding Limiting Thoughts

• Comparing what we think, feel, and do can reveal limiting thoughts.
• Being honest with ourselves is crucial to identifying these thoughts.
• Identifying limiting thoughts can be a moment of truth.
• Coherence between our thoughts, feelings, and actions is important.
• Changing our thoughts can help us live more authentically.

Living Authentically

• Living authentically means being true to ourselves.
• Identifying and eradicating limiting thoughts is crucial to living authentically.
• Living authentically requires coherence between our thoughts, feelings, and actions.
• Being honest with ourselves is crucial to living authentically.
• Living authentically means being true to our priorities and values.

The Importance of Priorities

• Our priorities shape our lives.
• Being true to our priorities is crucial to living authentically.
• Identifying our priorities requires honesty and self-reflection.
• Our priorities should guide our thoughts, feelings, and actions.
• Living authentically means being true to our priorities and values.

Three compartments in our brains

• Compartment one: things that are true and we know are true.
• Compartment three: things that are not true and we know they're not true.
• Compartment two: things that are needed undecided, we either don't know them or we know that they're not aligned but we can live with them for now.
• Marking them as compartment two in your head helps you acknowledge that the topic is unresolved and not within your priority today.
• Living assuming that it's compartment one is completely messed up because your actions are not matching your feelings and your feelings are not matching your thoughts.

Equilibrium in life

• Equilibrium is the point at which minimal effort is needed to live.
• Life is cyclical and all compromises.
• Being aware that you're not in your natural tendency and being okay with it is important.
• You can tell yourself that you're heading from that place to the point of equilibrium.
• It's easy to leave a lot of pendulums out of equilibrium, so it's important to prioritize and put them in equilibrium.

Linear processing

• Put the most priority pendulum in equilibrium and then focus on the next one.
• It's a constant journey and you're not alone.
• Instead of parallel processing, you're processing them in series.
• Fix one pendulum first and when it's done, fix the next one.
• Life is linear that way.

Constantly searching

• Life is a constant journey of searching.
• It's important to acknowledge that you're not alone in this journey.
• It's okay to not know what you want and to live with compartment two.
• Compartment two is not about solving the problem, it's about acknowledging that it exists and marking it as unresolved.
• Life is all about compromises and finding the right balance.

Requirements in Relationships

• Adding requirements to finding a partner reduces the pool of potential candidates.
• The n squared problem means that adding each requirement exponentially reduces the number of potential partners.
• Investing time and effort into finding a partner with specific requirements may not be justifiable by the return on investment.
• Everything exists, but the probability of finding someone with specific requirements may be low.
• Understanding the mathematics behind finding a partner can help prioritize and adjust expectations.

The Mathematics of Probability

• Mathematics underlies everything, including finding a partner.
• Adding requirements to finding a partner exponentially reduces the probability of finding someone.
• Understanding the mathematics behind probability can help adjust expectations and priorities.
• Increasing the probability of finding a partner with specific requirements may involve targeting a specific audience or community.
• Understanding probability can help in all areas of life, not just relationships.

The Economics of Love and Romance

• The economics of love and romance are often misunderstood.
• Having zero requirements in a partner means that the first person you meet could be a potential partner.
• Adding requirements to finding a partner reduces the pool of potential candidates.
• Investing time and effort into finding a partner with specific requirements may not be justifiable by the return on investment.
• Understanding the economics of love and romance can help prioritize and adjust expectations.

Prioritizing and Compromise

• Understanding priorities and making compromises is essential in finding happiness.
• Investing time and effort into something may not be justifiable by the return on investment.
• Compromising on certain goals or desires may be necessary to achieve overall happiness.
• Understanding the probabilities of finding something can help adjust expectations and priorities.
• Being true to oneself and targeting a specific audience or community can increase the probability of success.

Advertising Yourself

• Mix with the people you want to be with.
• Changes the probability drastically.
• Be careful what you advertise.
• Know who you are as a product.
• Don't advertise differently because you think others are more interesting.

Models of Love

• Traditional relationships are not the only way to be with someone.
• Look at all the models available in today's world.
• When you don't know what you're looking for, you're advertising wrong.
• Find out what you're looking for by using the triangle: what you think, feel, and do.
• Openly advertise what you want to the world.

False Advertising

• Our strategy tends to be the total opposite of openly advertising.
• False advertising gets more people, but eventually, you'll have to switch up.
• Conflict in relationships happens when you attract the wrong person.
• Prioritizing for the wrong target leads to conflicting desires.
• Don't go out dating others just to make sure you're still interesting.

Conclusion

• Know who you are and what you want.
• Advertise yourself truthfully to attract the right people.
• Use the triangle to find out what you're looking for.
• Don't prioritize conflicting desires.
• Be true to yourself and your desires to find happiness in relationships.

The Economics of Dating

• Dating is an economics problem.
• It is a market that is complex and constantly changing.
• There is so much supply that nobody values relationships anymore.
• People spend months of their lives trying to figure out if someone is right for them.
• It is important to know what you stand for and go to places where those things happen.

Money as an Illusion

• Money is an illusion at every level.
• Money does not actually exist.
• It was created to make our lives easier, but it has made them more difficult.
• Most people are chasing the revenue side of money.
• Money only exists when you work hard to pay it back.

The Cost of Money

• People often don't understand the cost-benefit relationship of money.
• Living in an expensive city for a high-paying job can cost more than just money, including stress and time away from loved ones.
• Buying expensive items can create a vicious cycle of working harder to pay for them.
• Savings can suffer from inflation, and money in the bank is not truly yours until you spend it.
• Many people waste money on things they don't need or use.

The Truth About Money

• Money is an illusion, and the value of things is often overestimated.
• Basic needs, such as food and safety, are the true goals of money.
• Risk, not income, is the true measure of wealth.
• Money cannot guarantee safety in an unpredictable world.
• Money should be spent on things that truly matter, not just to accumulate more wealth.

The Illusion of Safety

• Many people believe that money provides safety in an unpredictable world.
• However, money cannot protect against all risks, such as illness or accidents.
• Money should be used to provide basic needs and to enjoy life, not just to accumulate wealth.
• Spending time with loved ones and doing things that bring joy are more important than accumulating wealth.
• Money cannot buy happiness or guarantee safety.

The Importance of Perspective

• People should consider the true value of things before spending money on them.
• Time spent with loved ones and doing things that bring joy are more valuable than material possessions.
• Money should be used to provide basic needs and to enjoy life, not just to accumulate wealth.
• People should consider the true cost of earning money, including stress and time away from loved ones.
• Money is an illusion, and people should focus on what truly matters in life.

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The Happiness Expert: Retrain Your Brain For Maximum Happiness: Mo Gawdat | E144 - YouTube